maybe reading two romance novels consecutively doesn’t really help much with my lonely state of mind but it does give me a little rush hehe. also, it set my gears into thinking…do i romanticize love too much ? it’s like, i’m always a step ahead of the “now”. and i guess it can be hurting to yourself too, to always think so fondly of a regular love, a simple romance and try to spark it up and make it into something more. but that’s how some of us are, cliché in every fibre being of our body, right ? like, he wants present, but i want happily ever after. he’s looking for just temporary, i’m finding permanent. and it’s so difficult to accept the fact that not all the time do we ever get what we wish for. wishful thinking, only that, it is. hard to love, how to love – when you’re giving them all that you got and so ready to give them more than that, but all they could give you is nothing in return. not even a little piece of their soul. maybe they’d lend it to you, but’ll grab it back and make a run for the hills when you start to want more. so how do we really love when it’s this difficult ? i just couldn’t fathom it, at all. maybe that’s why people say love is just what it is – brave, bold and bedazzling.